Perfect
by American Mione
Summary: On Halloween, a young man visits a graveyard to talk to the three people who mean the most to him...OotP SPOILERS and mild HHr! Please RR! Ü


A/N: There are some OotP SPOILERS in this, so unless you don't care or have already read the book, I suggest you turn back now!  
  
This is a song I've had on my head for days, so I HAD to write a song-fic about it. I actually think it's one of my better short stories. It isn't really a romance, but there is some slight Harry/Hermione. I couldn't write a story without the two of them together! ^_^  
  
Disclaimer: The characters belong to J.K. Rowling, whom I am currently mad at because she killed one of my favorite characters in Book 5. The song belongs to Simple Plan.  
  
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Perfect  
  
(Harry's POV)  
  
A young man with unkempt black hair moved silently through a still graveyard. He stopped in front of a large marble tombstone. Two names were engraved in the smooth gray stone. The names of the two people he couldn't remember but would give anything to meet: his parents. The twenty-one year old knelt in front of the stone and began to speak in a low voice.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hey Dad, look at me  
  
Think back and talk to me  
  
Did I grow up according to plan?  
  
And do you think I'm wasting my time  
  
Doing things I wanna do?  
  
But it hurts when you disapprove all along  
  
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"Well, it's been exactly twenty years since I lost you, Dad. I say that I lost you, but I never really knew you. I met you a little through Moony...and Padfoot. Even Snape gave me a glimpse at you childhood. But I have to admit, I've always wandered what you would think about *me*. Are you proud of me? Did I turn into the man you've always wanted me to become? I don't know what who you wanted me to be, but I'm proud of myself. I'm an Auror now, and I just got engaged to this great girl I've known since I was eleven. I'm sure you and Mum would love her. She's the Charms professor at Hogwarts, and she's been my best friend for exactly ten years. Are you proud of me, Dad?"  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
And now I try hard to make it  
  
I just want to make you proud  
  
I'm never gonna be good enough for you  
  
I can't pretend that I'm all right  
  
And you can't change me  
  
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He stopped speaking for a moment and stood up slowly. He read the names on the headstone again. He paused as he read his mother's name.  
  
He sighed quietly and whispered, "Mum, I'm never going to be good enough for you, so I'm not even going to ask if I am. You saved my life at the cost of your own; I could never live up to you. I'm still trying though. If I could do anything to bring you back or stop the monster that did this to you, I would, but I don't think I can. The whole prophecy still seems surreal to me. It's driving me insane, yet it keeps me going. I didn't want it to change me, but I wasn't in control of my destiny. Some good things came out of it, like strengthening my bond with Hermione, but other things weren't as enjoyable.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late  
  
And we can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"For instance, I almost lost my friendship with Ron when I refused to tell him what the prophecy said. Dumbledore didn't want me to tell anyone, at risk of history repeating itself; you know, having a traitor on the side of Light. We eventually reconciled, but our friendship wasn't as tight-knit as it had once been. I did lose my friendship with some of the people in the other houses, but those amities hadn't been as strong in the first place. Still, if I could go back in time, I would change the past, so I wouldn't have lost those friends. But it's too late; and I can't edit the past so that I'm happier in the present. I'm not perfect, and my life has never been even remotely perfect, no matter what newspapers and books say. I'm sorry that I'm not flawless like you were, but that's the way I am. I love you, Mum, and you too, Dad, but I'm not either of you. I'm sorry I'm not the perfect son, even though I have the perfect parents. I'm sorry."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I try not to think  
  
About the pain I feel inside  
  
Did you know you used to be my hero?  
  
All the days you spent with me  
  
Now seem so far away  
  
And it feels like you don't care anymore  
  
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Tears blurred his sight for a moment or two. He looked at the tombstone one last time before he walked to a far corner of the cemetery.  
  
A memorial had been set up for his godfather since they didn't have his body; he had protested that he still deserved a grave. He swallowed back a sob as he read the words he had asked to be etched into the marble stone:  
  
Sirius "Padfoot" Black  
A Hero, A Best Friend, A Father  
Mischief Managed  
1958-1996  
  
"Sirius, you were the closest thing I ever had to a dad. Even though you missed twelve years of my life before I *really* met you, you were the greatest person I've ever known. You died before you should have, just like Mum and Dad...all three of you died because of some stupid prophecy. I still think about you, but I don't blame myself as much anymore. Hermione actually helped me through it. You were right about the two of us; we're getting married in a few months. I proposed to her tonight; it's the tenth anniversary of the day we became best friends. We've been a couple for about five years now. Sometimes I spend a day thinking about all the times we spent together, like the Christmas Mr. Weasley was attacked by the snake, so we spent the holiday at your house. I know how much you despised that house, but we've cleaned it up really well over the years.  
  
"I just have to know, Sirius; do you ever think about me while you're in heaven? I know you are with Mum and Dad again, but I hope you still watch over me. You always were the best at protecting me; you rarely treated me like a little kid, but rather as an equal. I realize that sometimes you couldn't tell me things, but you usually told me more than anyone else. I just need to know that you still care about me because sometimes I get this feeling that you forgot I even exist.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
And now I try hard to make it  
  
I just want to make you proud  
  
I'm never gonna be good enough for you  
  
I can't stand another fight  
  
And nothing's all right  
  
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"I didn't come here tonight to yell at you like the last time. I'm really sorry about that. I had had a bad day, and I selfishly blamed it on someone who could shout back at me. Sirius, I hope you are proud of me. You died to save me, just like Mum and Dad, but it was harder for me when you died because I had known you and could remember you. If you could be satisfied with how I turned out, I would truly be happy. You may not be my actual father, but you are the closest thing I can recall. My life took a tailspin downwards when you died, and it has never completely gotten back on track. We only knew each other for a few years, and I guess we weren't supposed to know each other forever." He gulped back more tears. "I really do miss you, Sirius."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late  
  
And we can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
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Regardless of his attempts to not cry, he finished his speech with tears in his eyes and some rolling down his face. He walked out of the burial ground with another look at his godfather's grave. He shut the iron gate behind him with a squeak, leaving the graveyard in silence once again. His feet had matted the tall grass down, leaving a reminder that he had been there...leaving the graveyard imperfect.  
  
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Nothing's gonna change the things that you said  
  
And nothing's gonna make this right again  
  
Please don't turn your back  
  
I can't believe it's hard  
  
Just to talk to you  
  
But you don't understand  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (Sirius' POV)  
  
A man in his late thirties watched his godson leave the quiet graveyard from a cloud in heaven. His eyes glistened with unshed tears as he thought about what the young man had said moments before: *I just have to know, Sirius; do you ever think about me while you're in heaven?*  
  
"Oh Harry, I think about you every day. You were my closest reminder of James and Lily until I came here and could be with them again. I may have been like a father to me, and you were like a son to me, as well as a best friend. You are exactly the same as James, but his total opposite at the same time. This is hard for me to say because I know you can't hear me, and I desperately want you to know this. Harry, I knew that you blamed yourself for my death, and it nearly killed me again. Nothing that happened that day was your fault, no matter what you say. So you aren't perfect; who is? You are a great young man, no matter what." Sirius chuckled to himself and added, "Tell Moony to have ten Galleons in his pocket when he dies. That's what he owes me for our bet about you and Hermione. He said you'd get engaged when you were twenty-five, but I said that it would be before you turned twenty-two. I guess I won." Sirius sighed quietly, matching the one Harry had made a few minutes earlier. "I really miss you too, Harry."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late  
  
And we can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (James' POV)  
  
A few feet away from Sirius, a young couple looked upon there twenty-one year old son. The man had messy black hair and hazel eyes, and his wife had thick, dark red hair that reached a few inches beyond her shoulders. They stood on the edge of a large white cloud and gazed down. They had both heard Harry's speeches, and it had affected both of them significantly. James Potter thought about what Harry had asked: *Are you proud of me, Dad?*  
  
"Harry," he whispered so faintly that not even Lily could hear, "I couldn't be prouder of you. You are better than the man I pictured you would be. I know that back in my Hogwarts days, I was an arrogant jerk, but you never acted like that. You were known throughout the wizarding world, but you never let yourself get a big head because of it. I got a big head just because I was considered 'cool' as a teenager, something I wish I hadn't happened. I've watched you with your fiancée. She's seems like the perfect match for you. Speaking of perfect, Harry, I'm not the perfect father. I was even farther from perfection than you are. My parents weren't perfect either because you aren't supposed to be perfect. But I need to tell you one thing, Harry: I'm proud of you, son. I couldn't be an ounce prouder."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late  
  
And we can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (Lily's POV)  
  
Lily Potter's almond-shaped green eyes that mirrored her son's filled with tears as she observed her only child. His words rang in her ears: *Mum, I'm never going to be good enough for you, so I'm not even going to ask if I am. . . .I'm sorry that I'm not flawless like you were, but that's the way I am.*  
  
"Harry James Potter, I don't want you to ever speak like that again. I wasn't immaculate, and you are a much better person than I was. You are the perfect son. It breaks my heart every time I see you because I realize I've missed so much of your life. I wanted so badly to be there for you, but I think you turned out wonderfully without my help. You *are* the perfect son, no matter what you tell yourself. I love you, honey. I would save your life again if I could because that's how special you are to me."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (Harry's POV)  
  
Unbeknownst to James Potter, Lily Potter, and Sirius Black, Harry Potter had heard their replies to him perfectly as he walked back to his flat. He smiled as he thought about what they had said to him.  
  
"Harry?" A young woman with wavy brown hair appeared at the door of the building. She smiled as she saw him. He rushed towards her and snaked his arms around her waist. Hermione wrapped her arms around Harry's neck and kissed him lightly on his lips.  
  
"Now *this* is perfect." Harry whispered as he kissed his fiancée again.  
  
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Lisa-Chan: That is so nice of you! I'm really glad you liked it! I'm sorry if I made you cry, but I'm still glad you called it "beautiful"! ^_^  
  
A/N: Okay, I didn't like the ending very much, but I didn't want to end it on Lily's point of view because it just didn't seem like a good place to stop. The song is "Perfect", by Simple Plan. It really is a great song, and the first time I heard it, I thought 'Wow! This would be a perfect (no pun intended) song-fic to do for Harry Potter!' I know...it is really sad; almost every song I hear nowadays I categorize as "song-fic" or "non-song- fic". Please review...it makes me feel special!  
  
3 PhoenixGirl1234567 


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